A PERSONAL EPIPHANY

I learned something about myself yesterday that I never knew before. According to the "urgent" letters I received from Mitt Romney and the Republican National Convention, I, The Flaming Bore, am one of the Republican Party's "top supporters." Good lord.  When did that happen?  

Not only that, but due to my "active political involvement and steadfast commitment to the Republican Party," I was chosen to participate in a 2012 Presidential Issues Survey and my answers are "vital."  Why, I do believe the entire future of the free world as we know it depends on ME!!

Now, truth be known, I lean more towards being a Democrat, but I am a registered Republican so I can join the fray in the primary elections. No one around here who is serious about winning dares to register as a Democrat, so anyone who wants to have much of a say in matters AND who doesn't mind being bombarded with taped phone calls and political flyers in the mail does what I do and pretends to be a Republican.  

So, with that in mind, I was more than amused to find out yesterday that I am such an astute party member "who has a finger on the pulse of your community."  Here are some of the "Presidential Issues" that were on this earth-shattering survey:

1.  Are you more enthusiastic or less enthusiastic about voting in the upcoming election in November than you were four years ago?  

3.  How interested are you in learning more about how to volunteer your time to defeat President Obama?

6.  How likely is it that you would recommend a friend to vote for Mitt Romey in the November election?

7.  Do you use social media like Facebook to communicate with friends and relatives?

And then we get to the REAL point of this survey, the biggest "issue" of all--question number ten, boxed and in bold print and labeled "critical."  Would I, The Flaming Bore, like to make a donation to the Republican National Committee?  I can start at $25.00 or just shoot my wad and go straight for the max at $30,800.  

Well, I filled out the 2012 Presidential Issues Survey and then added my own little comments, like:  "What's it to you?"  "So what?" "This is a Presidential issue?"  and "You must be kidding!"  I am an official political activist, you know, and my opinions are important!!!

I've been given special directions to "send this survey back within the next five days."  Mitt's in a RUSH to get his hands on my hard-earned retirement check, according to the mailing enveloped enclosed.  I have a feeling the poor minion who opens it is going to rush my survey (bereft of a donation, hefty or otherwise)...right to the waste basket.