STORMY WEATHER

Big Bore and I share the pet peeve of overly excited weathermen who interrupt what we're watching on TV with their Sky is Falling reports. We get all absorbed into some network program and then, BAM! "There's a raindrop in Colorado! Run for your life!"

A week ago a sudden hail storm bombarded a neighborhood in Wichita, so we had to hear about it for 30 minutes, long after the storm AND the show we'd been watching were over. There was debate over the size of the hailstones--was it quarter-sized or baseball-sized? Let's analyze these pictures of five hailstones and see. Then, of course, we had to be educated with, "Hail can causes serious damage, so get your cars in your garage as soon as possible." Big Bore's response: "Well, duh! I didn't know that!"

The newscasters have been milking last week's hail drop for all they can. Last night one of the stations had a follow-up story on damage estimates, incuding an in-depth interview with a roofer. I'll give 'em credit, though. At least this up-to-the-second story was during the regular news program and NOT a break-in during my beloved "The Bachelorette."

Our precious TV viewing did not go unscathed last night, however. "We interrupt our commercial time to report...."

"Oh, no!" Big Bore shouted. "There's basketball-sized hail falling in Colorado!!"

Actually, a thunderstorm was brewing in Cheyenne county, in the far northwest corner of Kansas, probably 300 miles from here. Apparently it didn't amount to more than a bit of lightning and thunder, much to our delight, so we didn't have to miss out on a single second of non-commercial, quality boob tubing--meaning we got to see every single amazing, awesome detail of Jillian and Ed's overnight date in the Fantasy Suite on "The Bachelorette." It ended with the bedroom lights being turned back on and Ed conked out on the bed, Jillian massaging his back, likely mumbling, "We interrupt this program with some pea-sized performance anxiety." I hope she remembered to park her car in the garage.