BEAR WITH ME

Last night was the world premier (and closing) of the local 3rd grade musical, "Three of a Kind," co-starring (with 42 other kids) Sweet Neighbor Girl as Mama Bear. We've been hearing about this merry event for weeks now. The basic gist is that Baby Bear is missing and all the other threesomes--The Three Little Pigs, The Three Musketeers, The Three Blind Mice, etc., are called upon to help find him.

Two days before the big show, Sweet Neighbor Girl practiced her lines on Big Bore and me, delivered in mushy-mouthed warp speed. We couldn't understand a single word.

"Good lord! Slow down and enunciate! Your audience wants to know what you're saying."

She just laughed. Maybe the Dr. Pepper she'd been drinking had given her a sugar high.

"You...don't...have...to...be...this...slow," I exaggerated in slo-mo, "but don'ttalksofastthatwecan'tunderstandyou."

So, yesterday before the big production she came over to show off her "Mama Bear look" and go over her lines one last time before heading off to school.

"Perfect!" I said. "You were not too fast. Not too slow. Just right!" said the old Grumpy Bear neighbor. We took some pictures and then she was out the door, ready for certain stardom.

I attended the musical--Big Bore opted out--but when I returned home he was curious about how SNG performed. "How'd Mama Bear do?" he asked.

"She was the best one there," I answered in all honesty. "In fact, she was pretty much the only kid I could actually understand."

P.S. Baby Bear finally showed up at the end. The little snot was hiding from his parents.