HANGING OUT

One of the great benefits of retirement is that something always seems to pop up that keeps me from doing chores around the house.

I was going to do some major dusting yesterday, but I couldn't find any dust buster spray in the cleaning cabinet, so off I went to the store to get some.  BUT FIRST I'd make a side stop to the library to put away books, as long as I was out and about.

In the middle of the book gig, Library Lady's assistant volunteer, Miss Linda, (another retired English teacher) asked me if I'd make a bulletin board to advertise the upcoming fundraiser, a murder mystery theatre.

"Sure. What supplies do we have?"  

About all we scrounged up was a box of construction paper.  "This'll work. I'll find some pictures on the Internet and whip up something."

So, I went directly home...forgetting all about the dust spray, of course, and started designing my own huge letters with the name of the play, IT'S A HANGIN' OFFENSE. Once I got them cut out, I jumped over to the computer and checked out some silhouette clip art with western themes. My eyeballs zoomed in on a hanging tree, complete with noose. Perfect. I printed it out, a few inches high, and tried to replicate a larger one on white construction paper as a template.

The drawing took awhile...mainly because I'm a lousy artist and cutter-outer AND Critter kept wanting to help, but finally it was done. Concerned that it might not look much like the original, I took my template outside to Big Bore for his assessment.

"Would you please look this over and tell me what you think it is?" I asked, hopeful that "hanging tree" would jump right out of his mouth.

He paused to give the cutout his critical eye. His face skewed quizzically. This was not good. "Hmmm."  Finally, an answer emerged.  "Is it something like a lava flow?"

"A lava flow?!!" I said incredulously. "Where do you see a lava flow in this?"  I was soooooo disappointed.  Even Critter could have given me a better answer. Was my artistic ability even worse than I thought?

"It's a hanging tree!" he laughed.

Relieved, I then set about tracing my template to black construction paper, cut it out--after removing Critter several more times from the action--typed up some labels with info about the big production, then returned to the library to throw it all together on the bulletin board, with the help of Miss Linda. By the time I was finished, it was time for "Jeopardy" to start, so I dashed back home to plop down in front of the TV and answer questions. Whew! What an afternoon!

So that's how a day of retirement usually goes. Somehow, the dust spray never got purchased and the dusting never got done, surprise-surprise. I will head back to the store pretty soon, with the best of intentions, and maybe the job will get completed today. At least, some of it.  

But first, I have to stop by the library to return some books and check out a few more.....