THE KEY TO SURVIVING BLACK FRIDAY

Last Thursday night, while still digesting our Thanksgiving turkey, 18-year-old great neph Bo announced to his grandparents, Big Bore, and me that he was headed out to that notorious discount store...the one that begins with a "W" and ends with an "art"--we'll just call it "Wart" for today...to wait in line to purchase a laptop computer.

"You already have a perfectly fine laptop computer!" the grands protested.

"I've had it since I was a freshman!" he protested back. Plus it was his own money he'd be spending. And you know those old adages: "A penny saved is...impossible" and "A teenager and his money are soon parted." Off he went to wait four hours to purchase the deal of the century.

Ninety minutes later, the phone rings. It's Bo. Seems he locked the keys in his SUV in his haste and excitement to be first in line. Oops! Could someone come out to the Wart store with the spare keys? And, while we're at it, would we bring his ear phones so he could while away the hours listening to music? Big Sis and Gramps went ballistic. Big Bore rolled his eyes. I started laughing. This was soooooo typical teen. Been there, done that, so I offered to do the dirty deed and take the keys out to him. No, Gramps would do it. He was sure I'd never find the SUV in the parking lot. So I rode shotgun.

Bo had given the general vicinity where the SUV was located so, in spite of the packed lot, we quickly found it. Gramps opened it with the spare key, grabbed Bo's key, and off we ventured into the store to find him. Here is where the REAL fun began. Now, you'd think he'd be standing in line at the electronics department, right? But noooooooo! Here's what we soon learned the Wart store had plotted out for the big midnight rush:

There was a different line for each electronics item on sale. And each line was strategically located throughout the store. There was a line in cosmetics, a line in sporting goods, a line in crafts, etc. Bo had told Gramps his line was somewhere close to the automotives department, but that turned out to be wrong. Where the heck was he? He's 6 feet 2 inches tall. He should be easy to find. Like rats lost in a maze, we searched the aisles and lines of waiting faces..and finally found him in the lighting department sitting on the floor. Good grief! At least help us out a little!

Key deposit made, we retreated from the Wart store well before the midnight hour of madness. Bo returned home at 12:17 AM with his purchase in hand and went happily, directly to bed. No word yet on whether or not he's had to go back to stand in the Returns line.

So, with all this said, what's the key to surviving Black Friday? Either just stay home and don't go shopping at all OR make sure you can rely on another old saying: "When the going gets tough, the tough...call Grandpa."