Today is Cattleman's Day in our little burg! I've wiggled into my nicest overalls and will soon saddle up Ol' Blue and mosey on downtown for the festivities. Here's what's on the agenda:1. All-You-Can-Eat Pancake Feed. I'd gain 10 pounds just sitting at the table. Forget it. The overalls can't stand the strain. I'll eat my cereal and banana in peace at home, listen to the TV, and read the newspaper before I head out.
2. No Bull Run (not be confused with the famous Running of the Bulls). There was a time in my not-too-distant-past when I'd be the first one at the starting line (and last to the finish line). But my aging, achy-breaky body says, "No thanks." I'm happy just to be able to walk.
3. Trick Roper Show. Nah. But I might go if he roped and juggled at the same time. Now THAT'D be a show!
4. King of the Prairie Contest. I don't know what the heck this is. If it's anything like Chippendale's, those hunky studs in their skivvies, then save me a front row seat!
5. Children's Ranch Games. I'll pass.
6. Art Show. Definitely.
7. Museum. If I'm not too tuckered out from the Art Show.
8. Parade. NO, NO, NO!!! Even with ear plugs, I'd be wacked out.
9. Cattleman's Banquet and Ball. Now, in my 36 years of living here, I've never been to this astute affair. I've always figured I'd get kicked out of the Banquet when I'd ask the food server to exchange my beef entree for chicken. And as for the Ball, I think this might just be a euphemism for something a little bit too boozy for my tastes. Plus, three hours of country music would be enough to do me in.
So, my day is all planned. A 10-minute walk-through at the art show. Happy Cattleman's Day to everyone!!! May your beef always be tender.
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