This just in from the Go With the Flow Department!! Seems as though a Japanese comedienne came up with a brilliant idea that is sure to make her millions: designer sanitary napkins. Wow! What a genuis! Proctor & Gamble has started marketing them in Japan with two designs: Stars, which I assume is for the ambitious, upscale gal; and Camouflage, no doubt made for the tough-minded woman who wants to attack her periods like a kamikaze.Inventor Naomi Matsushima says she wants women to be able to "pass their periods more happily." Yeah, like designer sanitary napkins are simply gonna wipe away the body bloat and those gut-stabbing cramps! Doesn't she know that part of the "fun" about menstruation is having the god-given right to bitch and moan for five days out of every month?
I'm not one to discourage a young entrepreneur like Ms. Matsushima, however, and if she wants to decorate sanitary napkins then she shouldn't just stop with stars and camo. I think she should add some bling to them--sequins and glitter for the discriminating lady who really wants to make a good impression. And why not branch into designer tampons while she's at it? She could open her own Pads and Plugs Boutique and make a small fortune. Right?
Just another sign that the civilized world has gone mad.
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