STUMPED

I judged a high school quiz tournament today and was relieved to find out that those nerdy techno-wizard teen brainiacs are just as stupid as I was when I was in high school. Maybe even MORE stupid, if that's possible. Here's proof: Q. Who was President of the United States when the Social Security Administration went into effect? The first kid who buzzed in said, "Richard Nixon." The next one guessed Eisenhower.

Then there was a math story question whose answer I correctly computed in my head in about five seconds. These kids were scribbling down numbers like crazy for 30 seconds and STILL had the wrong answer.

But these quiz team whizzes were not anywhere as dense as the people playing "Family Feud" on GSN tonight. Question: "Name an astronaut." The first two people answered with Neil Armstrong and John Glenn...off to a good start. But then...Bruce Willis and Neil Young? I don't think so.

The next time some eye-rolling, smarty pants youngster laughs at me for not knowing how to text message, I'm not going to feel an ounce of inferiority. I know who was president when the Social Security Administration came into being. In fact, I RECEIVE a monthly Social Security check and I don't need to spend a single penny of it on purchasing a calculator so I can do simple math. So there. Blast off. And say hello to Bruce and Neil for me while you're at it.