I hate flying! When I was in my 20's, I made a list of fears that I needed to overcome and flying was right up there at number one...so I bravely purchased a round-trip ticket from Wichita to Denver and back to visit with my sister's family who lived in Colorado at the time. I would conquer this phobia!
Well, I pretty much had to force myself to board the jet; the same Continental flight number had crashed landed in Wichita a few days earlier, so I was feeling even less confident. The stewardess who greeted me had a bruise on her face, but if she was ready to hop back on, surely I could survive a one-hour flight.
Other than a bit of turbulence, the trip went okay, but I was so mentally fraught over my first flight that I made myself ill, which ruined our family venture into the mountains. I couldn't get 50 feet from the cabin without having to dash to the bathroom with a not-so-charming case of Montezuma's Revenge, knowing that in a few days I'd have to get right back on that blasted airplane.
But--if at first you don't fare well, keep trying. Right? I was bound and determined to whip this fear, so when the opportunity arose to fly again, I was game...mainly because I'd be hooking up in Las Vegas with Dr. Maureen (pre-doctor days) and two hormone-infused guy pals who shall remain anonymous because neither one of us gals wants to be reminded about our poor taste in men. She arranged for me to get some Valium this time around. I fell asleep in the concourse area, almost missed the flight, and dozed off like a baby all the way to Vegas. So far, so good.
I'll skip how much fun (?) Vegas was. Remember, what happens in Vegas has to stay there, fortunately. Maureen and I flew back to Kansas City together, without the guys, and this time no Valium was needed. Somehow we were seated in first class, and we just kept drinking vodka screwdrivers as fast as the stewardess could serve them. It seemed that everything blurting out of our mouths was fall-down hilarious. Why, if the pilot had gotten on the intercom and announced, "Ladies and gentlemen, we have lost all engine power so prepare yourselves for crashing into the Rocky Mountains. Thank-you for flying Continental. It's been nice knowing you"--we would have laughed ourselves all the way into oblivion.
That was 32 years ago. I haven't flown since. I decided that if I can't get on a plane without having deadly diarrhea, being conked out by drugs, or becoming totally blotto from alcohol, then I have no business being in the air. Flying is, indeed, strictly for the birds!
6 comments:
thank God for what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas!!
but if you hadn't flown there, we wouldn't have had breakfast at Caesar's Palace and had those lovely pics taken with those statues!!!
we were pretty obnoxious on that flight back---how did we ever get home from the airport????
Good question. I'm not sure. I know my car was at the airport parking lot. Ah, yes, the statues of the stoned Romans. Actually, hanging around with them was a lot better than being with the M and M twins. Yikes!
I haven't been able to fly for the past eleven years due to health reasons and I hate it!! I feel trapped. Usually when I was fed up with living in a male dominated society, I would flee to a gf's house until I got to missing the men in my life again. One of the reasons I am working so hard to recover my health is so I can go "UP, UP and AWAY" at will again. I'm dying to go see a friend in Honduras, my parents in Kansas and check out my fav vacation spots in Mexico. I've got a yen for Puerto Rico and Hawaii and Tahiti has been seriously calling my name. My last three trips were to Kansas, Florida (Disney) and Mexico. I am overdue for a little escape time. Don't fence me in.
I have only flown once and it was pretty scary, but I still loved it. I wish I could afford to fly to more places. I would love to travel.
Your Vegas trip sure sounds fun. I wish you could spill the beans. ;)
Oh, Sarah, those beans have forever been digested!!!
There is a great deal of misunderstanding about the cause of fear of flying. It is not caused by a bad flight; most people on a bad flight don't develop fear of flying. Difficulty with flying is caused by insufficient ability to regulate feelings when facing uncertainty.
Research since the advent of the functional MRI just eight years ago has helps us understand how the brain works. We now recognize that the ability to regulate feelings is learned and that the part of the brain that does this regulation requires stimulation of the right kind during the first two years of life. The right kind of stimulation requires a caregiver who is empathically attuned to the infant and responds to the infants signals, rather than simply providing for the infant according to an agenda set by the caregiver.
If the child is afraid, the caregiver needs to tune into the child's fear in a way the child really knows the caregiver feels the same way. Thus the child knows he or she is not alone.
Then, the magic happens; the caregiver then lets the child know that -- though the child's fear is 100% shared -- the adult has an additional point of view, which is that it is not the end of the world; it will work out alright.
Many of us, obviously, didn't get such optimal early development. Thus, when facing uncertainty, we control our anxiety by being in control of the situation, or by having a way to out of it.
That works fairly well on the ground -- except for annoying those who regard us as control freaks. But when flying, there is uncertainty, of course. And, not being in control and not having a way out, there is no way to regulate the feelings.
Therapists try to help with CBT (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), but anxiety can develop so rapidly that CBT techniques cannot keep up with the anxiety build-up.
Hypnosis is pretty "hit or miss". If it helps on one flight, it can fail to help on another flight.
Medications are not to be recommended -- according to the World Health Organization -- because when sedated, the passenger doesn't move around enough to protect against DVT, Deep Vein Thrombosis. If a DVT clot forms, it is a serious and potentially life-threatening problem.
Also, use of medications -- according to research -- is only helpful in very mild cases of fear of flying. In more severe cases, medications make the flight worse!
I have tried to give a good understanding of the cause and cure of fear of flying in a video at
http://www.fearofflying.com/video_hs.shtml
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